used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
