I wannas sexs uuuuu
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
this hospital has no fireball
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
