sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
sex in a hospital.. check
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
