ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
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