I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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