I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Randomize
