I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize