i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
