No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Randomize
