Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Randomize
