just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
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