it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
it's great music for shaving your balls
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
