Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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