put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
