eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
you made out with another girl for some wings
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
My vagina is very pro this idea
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