They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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