just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
