Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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