p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
