stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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