my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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