does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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