Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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