In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
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