You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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