Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
