No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
