you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
