YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Randomize
