if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Dear god my vagina.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
