she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
sex in a hospital.. check
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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