i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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