Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
