Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
