so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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