This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
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