Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
