last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
