I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
