he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I'm both gender and math confused
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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