So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Randomize
