The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
