Me too!
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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