she takes plan B like it's going out of style
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
