you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
