he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
