hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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