everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
