I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
