I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
