when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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